My God, Those Arms: Scary Realistic Popeye Figurine

January 2, 2015


PROTIP: Never skip leg day.

Did everybody have a nice New Year's? That's cool, I think I was laying in the shower when the ball dropped. MY balls. HIYO -- I'm an adult now. This is a limited edition (of 500) "realistic" looking 12-inch Popeye figure designed by Head Toys and available for pre-order for $300 (that's a lot of spinach). Those arms, my God. Popeye must also have an equally impressive penis, because otherwise there's no way he wouldn't have already ripped it off and thrown it into outerspace by accident. And yes, that's my professional medical opinion (one of my New Year's resolutions is to pretend I'm a doctor more often).

Keep going for one more shot of the spinach > steroids.


Thanks to Rayzor, who tried arm-wrestling Popeye once and is now paralyzed from the toes up.

  • Benjamin Davila Infante

    Nice 4 pack! lol

  • Beanhimself

    "Scary realistic" my ass how is a man with sausage fingers like that going to operate button fly jeans?

  • Richard H Sanford

    They're not button fly. They're 13-Button No-Pussy Pants, courtesy of the US Navy.

  • shashi

    im afraid to ask but do you mean "no-pussy" pants to be pants made for people who are not pussies? or is it more like 'you're getting no-pussy in these pants'?

  • Richard H Sanford

    The last one. By the time you get done with undoing the buttons, your chance is over and you're not getting any. That's what our drill instructor told us when we got ours.

  • shashi
  • Meh

    What a boss! Now where's realistically model-led spin-age?

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    Before nine months ago I lost my job and then I was lucky enough to stumble upon a great website which literally saved me. I started working for them online and in a short time after, I've started averaging $10k a month... The best thing was that because I am not that computer savvy all I needed was some basic typing skills and internet access to start... -> Try it yourself <-

  • Meh


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