You had me at whiskey and donuts.
Note: Been sick all week, going back to the doctor now. Might be around this weekend to post some, but if not, I'll be ready to melt your faces off (with a tank-mounted flamethrower) on Monday.
This is the Craigslist ad posted by some sad sack of shit who can't beat Vanilla Dome in Super Mario World for the Super Nintendo. Vanilla Dome, seriously? Are you only playing with your tongue or something? Now listen -- I won't come beat it for you, but I will come over and TEACH you how to beat it. How does that sound? You know what they say -- give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day, but TEACH a man to fish, then you have a fishing buddy and you two can go out drinking and do fun stuff together. I'm saying I need a friend.
Thanks to JESTOR, ed and SourCream (mmmm!), none of which responded to my call for help with the last palace in Zelda II: The Adventure of Link.