These are the photographs taken by Canadian diver and photographer Keri Wilk after a particularly crappy encounter with a sperm whale. Apparently the 'shit as much as you can and wave it in the face of whoever you don't want around' defense technique is equally effective under the sea as it is above. SPOILER: upcoming quote likening the shit cloud to chocolate milk!
"At first, it seemed like a regular bowel movement," Keri explained.
"Four of us looked at each other with confusion, then back at the whale, expecting that any second its call from nature would come to an end.
"Instead, the whale bobbed up and down, spun in circles and waved the poo in every direction for several minutes while we just sat back and watched."
Scuba equipment can disturb whales, so Keri prefers to dive with just goggles and a snorkel.
"After a few waves of faeces were released and stirred vigorously by the whale, the water was like chocolate milk, I couldn't see my hand when I held it in front of my face.
"I had poop in my eyes, mouth, wetsuit, everywhere and I was soaked in it from head to toe. But, after leaving the cloud, it quickly washed away, and didn't leave a smell on us.
Wow, I can honestly say with almost 75% certainty that will not be on my bucket list. Befriending a mermaid who knows the way to Atlantis and is willing to take me there? Absolutely. Being trapped in a whale's shitstorm and getting some in my mouth? No. "Then why only 75% certain?" Things change. Maybe I'll have done so much by the time I'm 60 that swimming in a whale's rich chocolately Ovaltine will be the only adventure I have left.
Keep going for a bunch more shots of the wow, that shit got real-real.
Thanks to Closet Nerd, who didn't so much send this to me as much as I saw him post it on Facebook.