They've Got Robo-Strippers Now!: Light-Up LED Pasties

November 17, 2014


These are the light-up LED pasties available from Sasswear (link probably NSFW on account of barely covered areolas). They cost $32 a pair, are rechargeable, come in a variety of different shapes, colors and flashing patterns, and are the perfect pasties to give a strip club patron a seizure. Or mesmerize him out of all his singles. You know, I went to a strip club once with a bunch of my old college buddies for a bachelor party. "And?" I refused to pay the cover. $20, seriously? Come on, guys -- the hotel has free Cinemax, just just back and get me when you're done wasting money. KNOCK FIRST THOUGH, please don't just use your keycard.

Thanks to E V I L A R E S, who is so evil he plans on having his nipples replaces with flamethrowers.

  • shashi

    Light-Up LED Pasties! Coming soon to a Greggs near you!

  • I want some. I want to be able to, surreptitiously, turn them on and blow peoples minds.

  • BurlesqueMess

    Reusable!? so worth it! My burlesque company is going to go nuts over these!

  • S.M. Archer

    Skynet is already planning on strippers for the robot race.

  • 80sGamer

    Thanks for posting, GW. It's always nice to keep abreast of current events. An illuminating read.

  • shashi

    You made me laugh, very punny.

  • $18889437

    meanwhile feminists are always trying to tell us men shouldn't sexualize breasts while some girl is on the dance floor with light up nipples like "look at these!". I will... I will look at those. Also... this, from the web page "After all, strobing pink stars can accent a tight white V-neck on the bus just as effectively as they can a Kaskade show"... I'm not sure light up nipples on the number 8 bus to Cleveland is really the safest idea I've heard.

  • shashi

    only crazy people will actually believe you should not sexualize breasts. What is usually asked is that you dont objectify women, i.e. try and look past the flashing nipple guards and see the person behind the makeup and false eyelashes. or maybe raise your standards for a suitable mate.

  • $18889437

    Yeah... flashing nipples are actually a cry for men to really look into her soul and see the real person behind the blinking tits... lol... That said, whatever... have a good time with them blinky-tits, girl. Female sexuality is an awesome thing.

  • Guest

    You know, before I had to actually try a bit and woo the woman to discover where their tits were pointing at on their boobs. Now they are advertising it on the dance floor.

  • archer923

    Jarvis. Yes mam? Fire Chest RT's

  • Jenness

    Fancy! Though I think they missed the mark on the patterns, they should have the hypnotizing spiral patterns and one with guns on them ...oh and American Flags because that's totally patriotic and would fit in well at July 4th Festivities.

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