Toys R Us has announced it will pull the Walter White and Jesse Pinkman action figures it's stores have been selling after Florida mom Susan Schrivjer started an online petition to have the Breaking Bad figures removed. You know, despite the fact the toys were only sold in the adult action figure section of the store and not alongside Barbie and Transformers. Hey, everybody needs a worthless cause in life. *runs to Twitter to see if anybody's started a 'FloridaMom' satire account yet*
Schrivjer's petition had picked up plenty of media coverage. Even Walter White himself, actor Bryan Cranston, weighed in, tweeting, " 'Florida mom petitions against Toys 'R Us over Breaking Bad action figures.' I'm so mad, I'm burning my Florida Mom action figure in protest."
Using the name Susan Myers on Change.org, Schrivjer had noted the store's "selection of toys for children of all ages." However, she added, "their decision to sell a Breaking Bad doll, complete with a detachable sack of cash and a bag of meth, alongside children's toys is a dangerous deviation from their family friendly values."
"Kids mimic their action figures, if you will," she told the station. "Do you want your child in an orange jumpsuit?"
It's weird FloridaMom took offense to Breaking Bad but doesn't care that the store sells horror movie action figures (but they'll make me want to kill my friends!) and Grand Theft Auto. I suspect the Breaking Bad figures just hit a little too close to home. "Because of the meth?" I bet she or a close friend had a drug problem at some point. This is Florida we're talking about, after all. Which, FUN FACT: no matter where you travel in Florida, you're never further than 8-feet from a bag of meth.
Thanks to Derek, but not my roommate Derek, because my roommate Derek is fictional and only lives in the pages of Geekologie. I mean, he used to be real, but I killed him.