These are the Zombie Cutting Boards designed by Dave Stencil. Already a funded Kickstarter campaign, $35 get your choice of one of three zombie designs in a standard bamboo cutting board, $45 gets your choice of zombie on a cleaver shaped bread board, and $50 gets a standard cutting board in maple, cherry, or mahogany. Because who doesn't like thinking about rotting flesh when they're preparing dinner? I know I do. Plus other gross things loogies and doodoo. It's sort of a diet I invented (The Gross-Out Diet -- book coming soon) that makes it harder to eat so much. Also, I don't actually use a cutting board, I just cut things up right on the kitchen counter. I can't even tell you how many times I've gotten salmonella from raw meat, but apparently not enough to learn my lesson. Besides, people get all worked up about salmonella poisoning, but it's really just another name for 5-day diarrhea.
Thanks to Tim M, who doesn't need a cutting board because he cuts all his fruits and vegetables in the air like a real life Fruit Ninja.