Medical Student Masturbates To Death At Sperm Bank

September 16, 2014

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23-year old medical student Zheng Gang died of a heart attack while trying to produce a sperm sample at China's Wuhan University. Apparently it was Zheng's fourth donation in just over a week. That...wow, that's very generous donating. Some real philanthropy. Donating blood that often will probably kill you too. No word how many donations he wasted at home during the same time, but my guess is in the thousands.

Worried workers had accessed his private booth when they realised he had spent two hours inside.


It was his fourth visit in just over a week and he had reportedly been using sexy magazines to help him.

The incident was revealed after Mr Gang's family took the sperm bank to court claiming they were responsible for his death in January 2011.

The court dismissed the action saying Zheng was mature enough to make his own decisions.

First of all, yes, a 23-year old is old enough to make his own decisions and you can't very well sue a sperm bank for his death. You might as well try to sue the model in the 'sexy magazine' he was looking at. Your titties killed my son! Also, nobody wants to die with their penis in their hand. Even worse than dying with your penis in your hand? Dying with three penises in your hands because those other dudes are probably gonna be FREAKING OUT.

Thanks to whoever sent me this whose email I couldn't fine again, who's inspired me to take it easy with my wiener next time.

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