BRING IT: Stephen Hawking Says Higgs Boson Research Could Destroy The Universe

September 9, 2014


In news that makes me wish I was smart enough to conduct the research myself, Stephen Hawking is claiming that experimenting with the Higgs Boson particle could create a "catastrophic vacuum decay" and destroy the entire universe. I, for one, would like to see that happen. It would give God the opportunity to create a new, better universe with everything he's learned from this one. PROTIP: don't create humans again.

Death-by-boson could occur if scientists put the particle under incredible levels of energy, creating a "catastrophic vacuum decay" that would obliterate the known universe. In the introduction of the new book Starmus, a collection of lectures by respected scientists, Hawking explains how the "God particle" could get all Old Testament on us:

"The Higgs potential has the worrisome feature that it might become megastable at energies above 100bn giga-electron-volts (GeV)."

"This could mean that the universe could undergo catastrophic vacuum decay, with a bubble of the true vacuum expanding at the speed of light."

"This could happen at any time and we wouldn't see it coming."

Unfortunately, it would take a particle accelerator larger than earth to create the energy levels necessary for the reaction to take place. IF it would even take place. Keep in mind this is all theoretical. Speaking of -- if you could push a button and instantly destroy the world, would you? That was a trick question, because you wouldn't have time to decide before I jumped over you and pushed it with my face.

Thanks to CH, who agrees we need to petition NASA to get started on this earth sized particle collider.

  • Daniel R

    beginning = middle
    middle = end
    end = beginning

    All moments of beginning and end are in the now, all moments are expressed are apocalyptic and resurrecting in the now, the "end/beginning" is always occurring, on a micro scale and on a macro scale.The end is splicing atoms for some who know. Two negative makes a positive. Negatives and Positives are Neutraul. Get a Black Hole contained in the Large Hadron Collider so in the event of a "Higg-Bosom" particle, we could "simulatanesously" react and create a equilibrium due to the forward reverse principle that speed moves in "untime" in a black-hole, creating a negative vortex of the speed of light. So in essence, if this did occur, we could project a contained "black-hole" into the energy-field and contain the "amplitude" and voltage to an "current" level that would balance the polar spectrum of "entropy". Black hole is nothingness, nothing is everything, so the Order of a contained zero point energy gravity field would balance the wavelength of "infinite" that a God Particle would "explode". Maybe a "bubble" of black holes around the "shell" of the "God Particle" would be enough to contain the energy to maximize the kinetic intertia produced in a "closed system"

    Daniel R.

  • niz

    Where's Master Chief when you need him?

  • Sounds cool.

  • Spooky Mike

    Pretty sure it's a Boson he's worried about... not a bosom.

  • S.M. Archer

    If the universe is destined to repeat itself, does this really matter? It's all going to end eventually, and if other theories are correct it already has ended the exact way it is going to end, over and over and over again. So fuck it, lets get to Higgs Boson-ing the shit out of this place. oh, whats that? an LHC the size of Earth? Well, damn, how about the nukes?

  • Kanger

    "Unfortunately, it would take a particle accelerator larger than earth to
    create the energy levels necessary for the reaction to take place."

    This is needs to be in a HUGE BOLD FONT because most media decides to completely ignore it or leave it out of the quotes box like geekologie.

  • The Magnificent Newtboy

    Well that's a relief.

  • sizzlepants

    Didn't Hawkings also go on the record against activating the LHC a few years ago based on his belief that it would open a black hole on the surface of the planet?

  • in_extremis

    you mean CERN, construction for the LHC was cancelled in the mid 90's

  • Darian Vorlick

    Soooo, so the LHC that's running (well, technically down for upgrades) isn't the LHC?

  • disqus_k2QxOV9H7Z

    I don't think so. Sounds more like something sensationalist media would say by quoting him out of context. In fact I bet that many news sources erased the part where he says that this could only be possible with an absurdly humongous collider

  • asdfadfs

    but now he's only helped them get funding! give us grant money NOT to turn it on MWAHAHAHAAA

  • Angela Shaffer

    I will say on a serious note - how do we know that some other life form out there didn't already mess with this and thus created . . . us. Sort of makes ya think.

  • Jon

    We don't, it could also happen randomly, the universe is a big place.

  • Angela Shaffer

    All I could think about while reading this was Doc Brown screaming 1.21 Gigawatts.

  • wenkus

    Jiggawatts, you ninny.

  • Angela Shaffer

    Pronounced with a "J" but spelled with a "G". At least in the script it was spelling that way . . . with a "G". Uhm . . . Ninny who now? LOL

  • Some men just want to watch the universe catastrophic vacuum decay, Mr. Wayne.

  • Crackredactie

    Soo where to put the money?

  • Enkidu98

    How do we know some other alien species hasn't already done this?

  • disqus_k2QxOV9H7Z

    We can't know unless they send us a warning before turning it on.

    Hey little planet! Th s message was sent 2.5 millions of years ago. In case life on this tiny rock evolves to the state of intelligent life, and it develops a technology advanced enough to translate this message. We would like let you know that we are about to perform a massive experiment that will either tell us more about the universe or destroy it all. We are starting it in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

  • Pilsprite

    Though if another Intelligent life form had tried this in another galaxy, their entire species would also be wiped out, so the only way for them to have sent a warning broadcast throughout the galaxies, they would have had to sent a fleet of ships out into the closest Galaxy some time before depending on how advanced their intergalactic space travel is. and then if it did destroy the universe, then that fleet would have to been far enough into that next galaxy but close enough to somehow detect that the galaxy had just been destroyed, or not.

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