Zombie Apocalypse Ready Mountain Bike/Motorcycle

August 6, 2014


This is the Motoped Survival Bike Black Ops Edition. It's the perfect vehicle for getting around during the zombie apocalypse. I mean, provided you can't score a tank. Or a hot air balloon. Or a boat. If you're in the woods hunting zombies though, it's perfect. If you're in the woods masturbating, well, hopefully you're a bear.

The Motoped Survival Bike has a custom frame and gas tank, a rear rack and a gas can. Optional accessories include multitools, ropes, an axe and even a crossbow.

I would argue that the crossbow is not an OPTIONAL accessory, that is a MUST HAVE accessory. Cool Motoped Survival Bike, bro -- but where's your crossbow? "I didn't get it." Wow, you're f***ing dumb and I hope you're the first to die when the zombies come. *pointing* Whoa, what's that?! "What's what?!" *brains with shovel* Haha, later sucker! BROOM BROOM.

Keep going for more shots.





Thanks to OU, who is busy building a network of ziplines in the woods for getting around silently after the zombie apocalypse has started. Smart thinking.

  • Nice, great post ... that dirt bike made the top of the Dirt Guru Guide to the Zombie Apolocaypse - https://dirt.guru/dirt-guru...

    - Dirt Guru -

  • tokies

    is there any way to get that small engine using a diesel engine and adding some batteries for electric power? mixing the Zero design and this one

  • Seth Janisse

    The first time I looked at this all I could think was "how much"?

  • Jeff Dower

    Sorry but some serious changes would be made on mine.. first off, forget the 4 stroke and put a small diesel engine.. opens up a lot more opportunities for fuel. Second, ditch the crossbow for a light weight AR15.. exactly how many bolts out of that crossbow do you expect to shoot before your brain food. And add a small solar panel for your GPS and Cell Phone (if phones would even work)..

  • Leidenfrost

    ....but.... will it blend?

  • zin

    Severe lack of chainsaws

  • Jetch Vargas

    Gasoline will last only 6 months after that it will get spoiled. Even if you find a large container or the world reserve of gasoline it will not last 1 year. Bateria will eat it. After that you will only have a heavy mountain bike. The battery will last 2 years and all the batteries in the world will start to lose its juice or they will turn useless. Good luck with GPS working without people on earth giving it manteinance to the satellites.

  • bick

    Did you know gasoline is a fossil fuel?

  • Jetch Vargas

    Did you know its organic too? Im not lying google it. Baterias form in the gasoline, you cannot have gasoline for more than one years. Also gasoline comes from petroleum

  • Konstantin

    A two stroke can be converted to ethanol without too much trouble if you know what you are doing. And GPS will last a while without human intervention. The sats are in high orbit, so there is no decay. Precision will suffer once ground stations go dead, but you'll be able to get a general location for well over a decade. As for batteries, you are right, LiPo has limited shelf life, but you can replace it with something clunkier later. The bottom line is that survival will be hardest the first few months. If this equipment lats you a year, it could make a difference. And it won't be a complete waste of space even after that.

  • Kami Simmons

    How much does it cost?

  • The Magnificent Newtboy

    Post apocalypse madmax ish world sure, but crowds of hungry zombies? Surely you want a bit of door between you and the living dead? I still thinks its amazing though

  • Ollie Williams

    While I suppose the option of using it as a motorized bike is nice, the sound from a 2-stroke engine will ensure every zombie in a 2 mile radius now knows your location. Maybe that's been addressed, I can't be bothered to read the article. I have weather to report on.

  • Alexandre Alika Vaquer

    That's a 4 stroke engine, it's a Lifan brand copied after the very popular Honda engine ;-)

  • captain kringle

    but can it do donuts in my neighbor's yard?

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