This is a video of young Noah Ritter (who has never been on live television before) being interviewed at the Wayne County Fair in Pennsylvania. He is an all-star. If there were a such thing as live television interview Olympics, Noah would take the gold, Zombie "I like turtles" Jonathan would take the silver, and the Atlanta grape stomping lady would have been disqualified in the prelims, possibly for dying.
Seriously, hit the jump and just watch the video. So many solid one-liners.
Thanks to PYY, who would pay good money to sit around and listen to Noah tell stories.