Creationist Leader Announces Aliens Aren't Candidates For Salvation, Don't Exist Anyways So Who Cares

July 25, 2014


Ken Ham, president of the Answers in Genesis ministry (which operates the Creation Museum where he debated Bill Nye) recently announced on his blog that aliens aren't candidates for salvation because they aren't the offspring of Adam and only Adam's descendants can be saved. Oh, plus they don't exist anyways so what's the big deal? Sorry, E.T., maybe it's time you phone home and find your own God.

Life did not evolve but was specially created by God, as Genesis clearly teaches. Christians certainly shouldn't expect alien life to be cropping up across the universe. . . .

Now the Bible doesn't say whether there is or is not animal or plant life in outer space. I certainly suspect not. The Earth was created for human life. And the sun and moon were created for signs and our seasons--and to declare the glory of God.

And I do believe there can't be other intelligent beings in outer space because of the meaning of the gospel. You see, the Bible makes it clear that Adam's sin affected the whole universe. This means that any aliens would also be affected by Adam's sin, but because they are not Adam's descendants, they can't have salvation. One day, the whole universe will be judged by fire, and there will be a new heavens and earth.

Honestly, I'm about ready for the whole universe to get judged by fire THIS WEEKEND. Just bring it. I'm tired of all the bickering, let's just do this thing. I'm not scared. I'm more scared of riding in a car going over 40MPH. Plus it would be cool to see all the cosplayers attending Comic-Con on fire. "God to GW, you still in San Diego? Report in." Roger that, God. Yeah, they're flaming up real good now. I'm gonna grab one last hotdog and I'll see you back in the clouds, big guy. *rereads* Man, I rule at playing apocalypse.

Thanks to dr venkman, who informed me you should never, under any circumstances, try to capture an angel in a ghostbusters ghost trap.

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