International Affairs: US Student Has To Be Rescued From Vagina Sculpture In Germany

June 23, 2014

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An unnamed US student had to be rescued by 22 firemen (although I assume at least 18 were just standing around laughing) after got trapped doing God knows what in a giant vagina sculpture in Germany. I suspect he's one of those folks that likes dressing up in diapers and pretending they're a baby and was taking it ALL THE WAY BACK. Or he's just a run-of-the-mill pervert who can't help himself from crawling into a giant stone vagina.

On Friday afternoon, a young American in Tübingen had to be rescued by 22 firefighters after getting trapped inside a giant sculpture of a vagina. The Chacán-Pi (Making Love) artwork by the Peruvian artist Fernando de la Jara has been outside Tübingen University's institute for microbiology and virology since 2001 and had previously mainly attracted juvenile sniggers rather than adventurous explorers.


According to De la Jara, the 32-ton sculpture made out of red Veronese marble is meant to signify "the gateway to the world".

Police confirmed that the firefighters turned midwives delivered the student "by hand and without the application of tools".

Admittedly, it would be hard to not want your picture taken inside the vagina. That is just instinctual. Like trying to touch all the statues' boobs and penises at a museum. Oh great, here comes security. "Sir, can you please stop touching the--" IT'S WHAT THE ARTIST WOULD HAVE WANTED. *stone penis breaks off in hand* Now look what you made me do! I'm keeping it.

Keep going for a couple shots of the rescue. And please, try to keep the 'first and last vagina he'll ever get inside' jokes to a minimum.

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Thanks to Andreas, who agrees dude should have really committed and dived in head-first.

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