Star Wars Episode VII Gets A Mock-Up Movie Poster

May 6, 2014


This is a Star Wars Episode VII movie poster as imagined by UK designer Old Red Jalopy for MTV News using photos of the recently announced cast. Is this what the actual poster will look like? Probably not. Are we all going to dress up as our favorite characters and go see the movie opening night December 18th, 2015? Not if my giant planet-destroying laser has anything to say about it! "You built a Death Star?" Come on, how could you not know I was talking about my penis? It's like we're just two ships passing in the night now.

Thanks to Ben K, who took the opportunity to give me his opinion of the new cast, which I did not read because it was too long. Dammit Ben, I have the attention span of a guppy.

  • Casey

    A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.... There were no Asians.

  • Nerf_Herdr

    What are you talking about, no Asians? Nute Gunray and the other Neimodians aren't Asian, they sure sound it. Empire also had at least two Asian guards on Cloud City. In ROTJ, you have Jabba's dancer, the blue skinned Twi'lek Lyn Me who even has an Asian name and there is the Asian pilot who Kamikazes his A-Wing into the bridge of the Super Star Destroyer, causing it to crash into the Death Star and be destroyed during the Battle of Endor, a feat probably only surpassed by the destruction of the Death Star itself. Daniel Logan and Temuera Morrison, both New Zealanders, technically are Pacific Islanders, could be considered from Asian descent. Bai Ling was in Revenge of the Sith. And finally there was an Asian Jedi girl named Bultar Swan. No Asians, you sure?

  • Butter Biscuits McGee

    That looks like the nerdiest/gayest star wars movie ever ... I love it.

  • omg that's horrible!!!

  • Emmitt Morgans

    HA! Someone out there thinks we're actually going to see ANDY SERKIS' actual face in a STAR WARS movie!?


    Someone's not familiar with his career, are they?

  • Fercho

    (Hopefully) Not at all.

  • Arturo Castillo

    this wont end well

  • Wiley

    Oh I'd love it if Mark Hamill was taken out and Disney made a clause in their contract that they would allow the movie to be made only if William Shatner played the part of old Luke.

  • adsfasdfasdf

    episode vii: damn we all got old

  • n11

    Wow, either Ford or Hamill could play the Emperor at this point.
    But they still got the spirit!

  • WhiteEagle2

    I'm so glad this is just an imagined poster, not an official one.

  • Guest

    With the current trends in movie posters, its probably not far off. Really, its start wars, they could slap up the logo with a VII under it and a date and its wouldnt affect ticket sales one bit.

  • Atom Kahn

    Its funny how after all of the shit that has been talked over the years about Carrie Fisher, she looks better than all of the old cast members.

  • newy0rkminute

    That's not a very recent picture of her.

  • ODwanKenObi

    Not better than Chewey. He hasn't aged a bit.

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