You Sure?: Loch Ness Monster Spotted In Apple Maps App

April 21, 2014


Note: Closeups of the beast after the jump.

This is an image from the satellite used for Apple's Maps app of what some crazy people are calling the Loch Ness Monster. The photo would make her about 100-feet in length. Is it really her? That's for you to decide. Jk jk, that's for me to decide. *eying picture* Nope, not her -- Nessie's flippers are way smaller. Maybe this is her older brother. Listen, you really want to find the Loch Ness Monster? Here's what we do: erect a floating shrine to Nessie in the middle of the loch, and tie a virgin volunteer (who will be bodypainted to look like the monster) to the shrine. "And then?" And then drain the loch.

Keep going for a couple more shots.



Thanks to E V I L A R E S, who's so evil he's actually in Loch Ness right now piloting a monster shaped submarine.

  • rangerjen

    It looks like a plecostomus. People really need to stop flushing tank fish down toilets.

  • Bat Guano

    Right now, Japanese scientists are placing explosive detonators at the bottom of the Loch to blow 'whatever this is' out of the water. Hopefully, the protective spells in place will protect it. I, for one, wish for peaceful existence with our underwater ally.

  • zin

    I'd be more inclined to believe it was a 100ft catfish than Nessie. Let that legend rest in peace already.

  • Guest

    maybe nessie *is* the 100ft catfish

  • Looks like a "Dave"

    When did the satellite take the picture, cause, geez, I was there on vacation not long ago and I swam in Loch Ness but I didn't see any monsters, while I was there, alone, in the water, swimming around, paddling my feet with my gray flippers on.......

  • Dobratev

    looks like a sturgeon at first glance. buuut.... get in close and it does look like a ghost, when you render a satellite images you have to overlay frames and edit out anomalies, leaving the ghost of the boat and it's wake. gutted.

  • adsfasdfasdf

    there was a guy awhile back that shot a sturgeon in the loch when it came near some kids

    edit- no, that was lake champlane

  • AtomicMountain

    As a SpecialFX professional, I can tell you that this photograph is absolutely real. 100%. It's freakin' 'Nessie. Anybody who claims to be any other kind of photography professional and says that this image has been edited is a liar and not to be trusted.

  • jarek redman

    As someone who takes baths daily, I can tell you also that this photograph is absolutely not real.

  • Andrew Shewmaker

    actually as a photographer I can tell you that is a large boat that has been removed from the picture and the wake has been left behind.

  • Guest

    boo. killjoy

  • Jeremy C. Scott

    Yeah I was thinking that too, looks exactly like a wake from a boat.

  • Billy___Bob
  • Guest

    basking shark.

    not ridiculous, humpbacks almost swallowed some idiot divers who swam too close while they were eating afterall. they won't go after you but not like they go out of their way to avoid you either even if they can see that well to know you're there.

  • wavesssss

  • TalonDesigns

    As much as I would love to believe that this is in fact true, this photo really leads me to believe that it isn't.

  • looks like a fish

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