Rejoice!: Powdered Alcohol Gets Approval For Sale In US

April 22, 2014


Because sometimes trying to sneak a bottle of bourbon taped to your nuts into a sporting event still gets confiscated by security, now there's Palcohol, a powdered alcohol that's just been approved for sale in the US. That way security will just think it's fat sack of coke and call the police! It's just powdered alcohol, I swear -- I just didn't want to pay $16 for a cocktail! *getting handcuffed* My only crime is being thrifty!

What's worse than going to a concert, sporting event, etc. and having to pay $10, $15, $20 for a mixed drink with tax and tip. Are you kidding me?! Take Palcohol into the venue and enjoy a mixed drink for a fraction of the cost.

We've been talking about drinks so far. But we have found adding Palcohol to food is so much fun. Sprinkle Palcohol on almost any dish and give it an extra kick. Some of our favorites are the Kamikaze in guacamole, Rum on a BBQ sandwich, Cosmo on a salad and Vodka on eggs in the morning to start your day off right. Experiment. Palcohol is great on so many foods. Remember, you have to add Palcohol AFTER a dish is cooked as the alcohol will burn off if you cook with it...and that defeats the whole purpose.

So...can you snort it? Because this sounds like it could be dangerous. AND I LIKE DANGEROUS. I'm going to bury my face in a pile of this stuff like Tony Montana at the end of Scarface. "And then?" The same thing Tony did. "Shoot up your mansion?" After that. "Die?" Exactamundo! And then my ghost is going to sue the company. "For?" An afterlifetime supply! This might be my best idea so far.

UPDATE: Government says Palcohol was approved for sale in error, will not be on shelves (or up anybody's ass) soon.

Keep going for a shot of the questionable-looking packaging.


Thanks to Thaylor H, Ed and Mr. K., who prefer to get drunk the old fashioned way: in a bar surrounded by a bunch of a$$holes talking way too loud about nothing.

  • Mazer Rackham

    crack and beer all in one!

  • John Whatmeworry

    'Vodka on eggs in the morning to start your day off right.' Guy, you have a serious problem.

  • o0THX11380o

    Looks like the alcohol lobby and giant corporate interests have decided to change our representatives minds. All of a sudden, it was approved in error huh?.... right. Free market my ass.

  • joevsyou

    for a estimated 2 millions dollars ANYTHING can be approved,,

  • Guest

    and for a few million more from the competition it can retroactively become a mistake to be corrected.

    down with the venue lobby their $11 beers and their culturally insensitive frisking.

  • Guest

    i like poprocks. they were supposed to be powdered soda or something until people started eating the powder dry. time to invent a new food out of not using this to mix drinks

  • Lupin Super

    I'm still trying to work out how they did it (after hearing the original story months ago -prob here) - isn't enthnol a liquid that really wants to stay a liquid...or gas. How do you "dry" it?

    The better story that came out around the same time as this was announced (back then) was the UK drugs guy trying to make "synthetic booze" - with the goal of being able to become instantly sober with the "antidote" - bye bye hangovers!

  • baal

    They might have bound the alcohol to something like diaper / tampon fluid locking gel crystals.

  • adsfasdfasdf

    maybe they shoved it liquid into lots of tiny sugar(or carbohydrate or whatever) coatings? like its trapped in the crystals and when it dissolves it comes out.. like the fizz cavities in poprocks. but full of vodka instead of co2

  • Bertw192

    Would this be legal on an airplane? If so, no wonder the FDA denied approval... No way they'd let you consume your own alcohol on the plane.

  • this is interesting. what are they going to isolate next?

  • adsfasdfasdf

    bullshit, theres so much red tape how do they simply misstamp and approve by mistake?

  • disqus_k2QxOV9H7Z

    Following the link seems like it was a label problem so they will send new labels to be approved.

    I don't even want to drink it but the idea seems pretty cool. And we will get some weird news for Geekologie when this product get on the shelves. After all people already have killed themselves by filling their butt with normal liquor, imagine the possibilities of powdered alcohol!

  • adsfasdfasdf

    they could do that cinnamon thing but with booze

  • I think it's already been retracted...

  • Andrew Newton

    looks like I will look like I'm doing coke in the near future.

  • Bertw192

    Should probably update your article GW... turned out that the product was "accidentally" approved and now it's no longer approved by the FDA... Too bad... I really wanted you to figure out what would happen if you snorted it.

  • Guest

    if its surgar or chalk based powder then smarties seem close enough/ according to an article cbs did on "the alarming new trend where tweens crush up smarties into a powder inside the wrapper, twist it up like a joint and exhale a cloud of the powder which they had first drawn into their lungs"
    (a shit title btw, for one thing the article was also about snorting smarties before a quiz)

    Health experts fear the behavior may lead to harmful conditions.
    Some kids have already shown signs of developing a “smoker’s cough.”
    Oren Friedman, a Mayo Clinic nose specialist, cautioned that frequent
    use could lead to infections or even worse, albeit rare, conditions,
    such as maggots inside the nose.

    now hopefully the alcahol would kill the magots, but what if you get the tequila flavored powder? obviously then they eat your brain like an episode of "monster inside me"

  • WhiteEagle2

    I'm not sure who would be more against this, angry parents or venue owners.

  • TalonDesigns

    This is just a series of Darwin Awards waiting to happen... SMH...

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