Boning In The Ocean: $290,000/Night Luxury Submarine

February 20, 2014

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This is the Lover's Deep, a luxury submarine that rich people can rent to have sex in under the sea. It costs $145,000/night per person though and there's a two-night minimum, so unless you're planning on bringing a love doll for the least romantic getaway of all time, the minimum stay with another human being will set you back $580,000. I suggest going Dutch. The luxury sub comes with giant exterior-illuminated windows so you can watch all the fish and shipwrecks go by while you're boning. Just don't let your lover catch you eying the mermaids too hard mid-coitus, or you might have a problem. And do not, under any circumstances, call her Ariel. Just trust me on that one (I had a girlfriend break up with me for asking her to cinch her legs up in a trashbag and flop around in the bathtub).

Keep going for several more shots of the most magical two nights of your life.

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Thanks to Dave, who claims he's had sex in Dr. No's underwater base from James Bond, and I have no reason not to believe him.

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