I'm Lucky I Survived MIddle School: Man Killed By Wedgie

January 8, 2014


In news that shouldn't surprise anybody who's been wedgied so hard they could taste elastic, a 58-year old Oklahoma man died after receiving an atomic wedgie (over the head) from his 33-year old stepson. For reference, that is far too f***ing old to be giving people wedgies (wet willies and purple nurples still okay).

Brad Davis was arrested and jailed on Tuesday for killing his step-father, Denver Lee St. Clair. Apparently, the wedgie knocked St. Clair out, causing him to fall and strike his head. While unconscious, St. Clair asphyxiated inside his own briefs (or boxers--from initial reports it's not clear what he was wearing).

Wow, suffocating in your own underwear. That's a pretty shitty way to go. See what I did there? I'm ashamed of it. A MAN DIED HERE.

Thanks to A, who agrees if he'd been wearing a thong this never would have happened.

  • Elak Swindell

    How would you be able to pull someones underwear that far up and over their head to actually do an atomic wedgie? In cartoons, physical properties of objects are always stretched beyond realism, but this situation seems off. The step-father must have had some enormous underwear to allow this situation to happen.

  • Amon Etzio

    I'm pretty sure it didn't actually all go over his head as in a true atomic. I read the article on it and it said the waistband was around his neck and that and blunt force trauma to the head is what killed him so obviously the waistband separated from the underwear and he left it around his neck.

  • Prometheus

    I'm sure they might have been enormous but this is nothing to laugh about Data!

  • Mr. K

    Oh man, I'd hate/love to be the writer in charge of this obit in the local paper...

  • MustacheHam

    The moral of the story: Wear boxers, they just might save your life.

  • The Magnificent Newtboy

    Hilariously tragic.

  • lordpikachu

    that's some stretchy underwear...

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