Your Ass Isn't Worth It: $1-Million/Roll Gold Toilet Paper

October 9, 2013

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This is the $1,376,900 AUD (~$1,300,000 US) roll of 22-karat gold toilet paper sold by the Toilet Paper Man in Australia. You think the Toilet Paper Man always wanted to be the Toilet Paper Man when he was growing up? "I'm gonna be up in everyone's asses!" he probably told kids on the school bus. Each gold roll comes hand delivered with a bottle of champagne, which is a ripoff if you ask me because the cost of my gold toilet paper should not include SOMEBODY ELSE'S AIRFARE. I don't care if it's the Toilet Paper Man, he should be able to flush himself to me.

Thanks to Troy, who wants to see those cartoon Charmin bears with gold dingleberries.

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