Well Of Course It Is: 18% Of Americans' First Choice For An Exotic Pet Is A Dinosaur

October 9, 2013


Because if somebody asks what kind of pet you want you better shoot for the f***ing stars and tell them a dinosaur, 18% of Americans polled said they'd like to care for one of the prehistoric beasts over any other animal. Obviously, these people represent the brightest people polled. Other acceptable answers include dragon, gryphon, phoenix and unicorn. More facts and figures from the pet poll:

Fifty-two percent prefer dogs, 21 percent prefer cats, and 27 percent aren't sure which species they like better.

Twenty-one percent rated snakes as the most terrifying animal, followed by alligators at 19 percent and sharks and bears at 18 and 14 percent, respectively.

Eighteen percent believe the Loch Ness Monster is real.

On preferences for an exotic pet, 26 percent said they would choose a tiger, 20 percent a giraffe, 18 percent a dinosaur, and 16 percent an elephant.

You think it was the same 18-percent of people who believe the Loch Ness Monster is real that also want dinosaur pets? Because that seems like too big of a coincidence to not be the case. If somebody came up to me and asked if I could have any pet in the world, what would it be, I'd look them dead in the eyes and say a fire breathing dragon that only answers to me. So...where is it? "I'm sorry sir, this is just a poll." *shaking* YOU LITTLE SHIT, I THOUGHT YOU WERE A GENIE.

Thanks to lilco, who agrees the best pets are imaginary because then you save on pet food.

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