Oh Goody: A Haunted House You Walk Through Naked

September 23, 2013


Because there's nothing more terrifying than getting scared with your loose pecker flopping around, Pennsylvania's "premier haunted scream park" Shocktoberfest will be offering nude tours of its haunted house this fall. Obviously, I will be attending every showing with a sock over my johnson to avoid scaring the performers.

It's called The Naked and Scared Challenge. The haunted house still has the usual array of people jumping out to scare you . . . only now you're facing them without any clothes on.

The people behind the haunted house say you don't have to worry about a bunch of people staring at you naked . . . since it's completely dark in the haunted house and only people who are allowed in there with you are also naked as a jay bird. So you're running though the house with a bunch of other naked people you don't know in the dark... kinky.

The haunted house will open in a week. Nude tours will be after the park closes at midnight, but if you think nude is not the right option for you, they will let you walk through with your underwear on for the "prude" option earlier in the night. A fully clothed option is always available during normal business hours as well... STIFF security will be enabled so there won't be any funny business during the nude tour.

Sounds like a great time! One male visitor who was visibly shaken after the experience had this to say, "My penis literally grew arms and crawled back inside me when I heard the chainsaws." Heck yeah, surprise mutant penis! But can it do chin-ups with your belly button?

Thanks to NinjaMuffin, who agrees there should be a haunted house you experience ON FIRE.

  • Jacob Kral

    Why is this a thing? Wth is wrong with people..?


    What about fear boners? Given that question, is it obvious that I'm a girl that has no idea what she's talking about? SHHHHHHHHHHH I learned about it on The League.

  • Mr. Awesome

    "There are three, three, three kinds of erections. Some are sexual, some occur during periods of nervous tension, but there's a mysterious third kind, that no one really understands, it happens when your schlong decides to take matters into it's own hands. No reason boner."

    ~Danny Sexbang, 2011

  • "...running though the house with a bunch of other naked people you don't know in the dark..." That brings back memories.

  • I want to party with you

  • Sabocat!

    Wow is that ever going to backfire.
    Me being naked is going to terrify the "scarers"
    Come back! I just want a hug....

  • Scottii Mariotti

    Stiff security will be met with stiff opposition

  • jrose

    Lightsaber duel!

  • I actually live near where this is held. Last year my step-son had a part time job there as one of the scare-ers(?). He usually worked until about 11pm. If they would have had THIS, I totally would have made him wait in the car so I could do a quick streak.

  • moban

    i live about a half hour away from here as well. one of my favorites in the area

  • Benjamin Cody Collins

    LOL NICE!!!

  • Frédéric Purenne

    So I'm guessing the guy who thought of that has a fetish for shriveled ball sacks retreating in men's crotch and puddles of piss on the floor...

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