Finally, A Decent Smartphone Controlled Vibrator

September 9, 2013


Meet the Clicktorix, a $85 smartphone controlled vibrator. The intensity is controlled via a free app, which also provides an estimated time till orgasm and calories burned. Cool, but why not just make a smartphone ATTACHMENT that's a vibrator. I'll tell you why -- because sometimes I have to borrow a women's phone and I'd like to pretend it wasn't down her pants. Or is it the other way around?

Turn your smartphone into a pleasure control with the "Clicktorix" Smartphone Controlled Vibrator, a device that allows your lover to play good cop / bad cop by switching among its ten different vibration intensities, stopping and starting, and generally working you up into a rage... the possibilities are as unlimited as your imagination.

Did you know that you can burn up to 4.2 kilocalories per minute while masturbating?

For me, pleasure is an afterthought, I use Clicktorix to lose weight and stay in shape.

Whoa whoa whoa -- masturbating to stay in shape? Is that even possible? Because I've got a belly that I wouldn't mind getting rid of without having to go to the gym. Now if you'll excuse me, I, uh -- I have a very important call to make. "It's in your butt, isn't it?" I'M EXERCISING.

Thanks to Natalia, who works for the company but didn't offer to send me one which kind of hurt my feelings because I love free sex toys (just not used ones).

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