Concave Mirrored Skyscraper Creates Death Ray, Melts Car

September 4, 2013


A new skyscraper in London nicknamed the Walkie Talkie has melted a car parked nearby because the curved and mirrored exterior of the building focuses the sun's energy on a nearby street in the afternoon. What architect would be foolish enough to design such a building? Oh right, THE SAME GUY RESPONSIBLE FOR BUILDING THAT DEATH RAY HOTEL IN LAS VEGAS BACK IN 2009. You get your architecture degree from the back of a cereal box? Maybe you should just stick to building LEGO playsets. Or at least only catering to supervillains.

The car belongs to Martin Lindsay, the director of a tiling company, who parked his Jaguar in central London's Eastcheap on Thursday afternoon.

The car was in the ray for just an hour but the panels were buckled and there was reportedly a smell of burning plastic.

People walking buy often have to shield their eyes from the incredible glare and the building has been dubbed the 'Walkie Scorchie' by nearby workers.

Joint developers Land Securities and Canary Wharf said they are investigating, adding: 'As a precautionary measure, the City of London has agreed to suspend three parking bays in the area which may be affected.'

Seriously, why does this guy keep building concave skyscrapers? Because maybe he should stop doing that. That's like a car designer who keeps putting the ejector seat buttons on the windshield wiper knob. First time it rains somebody's going through the roof.

Hit the jump for some shots of the damaged car.





Thanks to Erica G and dave, who have always dreamed of living in giant death rays and watching everything outside their mirrored walls burn. Me too kinda.

  • qwert`

    stupid shitty plastic cars.
    I bet an american made car from the 50s woudn't have american car from today would probably melt if you turned the engine on though

  • qwert`

    its the SAME ARCHITECT who made the OTHER ONE! We're way past the point where this is a reasonable mistake to be making and now it feels intentional.
    err....I actually heard this on my own and skipped the article to comment. derf. Well anyway I want to hire him to design my evil headquarters. He'd probably put in the revolving bookcases and Parana tank seat drops without all that safety edging nonsense the last guy told me I'd need.

  • Bling Nye

    Sunny in London? Foggy London-towne?

    I call shenanigans.

  • Beet LeRace

    Tan mom's gonna be all over that spot.

  • iofo61

    Proof that architects are designers, not engineers. Don't you at least need to study some science to become an architect? Or maybe have played with a magnifying glass on a sunny day when you were a kid?

  • qwert`

    whats worse is the same guy designed the hotel that singed a guest's hair in Vegas so he should know by now even if he never learned lol. I think he does it on purpose because he heard of Archenemies using mirrors to sink a fleet of ships and thought random buildings needed more of that.

    so he didn't just sleep through class, he slept through news and any feedback about his previous buildings. You'd think he'd at least check up on previous things he's built.

  • Konstantin

    I've taught optics (among other thigns) to architects at university. Most of them acted like it's something they won't ever need and avoided paying attention as much as possible. I see it's a universal problem.

  • Where else is this happening that classifies it as a "universal Problem"? As an architect the only light behavioral qualities I am really concerned with is for specific activities. A concave building in one city is a brainfart not a universal problem. Sorry, don't mean to come off argumentative, just a humble opinion.

  • Bling Nye

    None too bright, are they?

  • Zack Duffer

    Needs to be quoted: "... people walking buy (sic)..." because the original author said 'buy' but should have said 'by'.

  • Guest

    Why go to a tanning salon when you can just stand in that one spot for 15 seconds?

  • BillyBob

    "Walkie Scorchie"? That's the best name they can think of?!

  • flyingmonkey456

    The building's original nickname was "Walkie-Talkie", apparently because of it's shape (I don't see it).

  • DrZanz

    To be fair it sounds better in a london accent. But yes, still pretty shit.

  • Azariel_z

    one building away from becoming an evil Dr Willy...

  • Jeremy Tilton

    The Vdara in Vegas was doing the same thing, only it was pointing down to the pool and melting humans.

    And I just learned it was the same architect who designed both buildings. Rafael Viñoly.

  • flyingmonkey456

    I wonder where you learned that it. *Eying the other reply*

  • SZMatheson

    It's the same damn architect too.

  • ODwanKenObi

    That's no moon!

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