You've Got To Be Kidding Me: $13 A Roll Toilet Paper

August 27, 2013


Because rich people are running out of things to spend their money on, a company in Japan is offering a toilet-paper-of-the-month style subscription service that delivers $13/roll ass paper to your door every month. I think we can all agree when I say thank goodness there's no limit per household. If you order three rolls at a time it comes out to $17/roll, but if you get eight the price drops to around $13/roll, and you get to choose how frequently you want the paper to come. Me? I use about a roll a day, so I'm gonna need at least an eight pack a week. That's $104 a week on toilet paper. But hey -- my ass deserves the best. I'm joking, my ass doesn't even deserve newspaper BUT IT GETS IT ANYWAY.

Hit the jump for a closeup of the pretty printed designs it comes with, then close your eyes and imagine those as all wadded up as butt crumbs.


Thanks to Mel, who heard those Charmin bears are busy in the woods plotting to burn this fancy toilet paper factory to the ground.

  • Patrick Piklapp

    I am Cornholio, and I need custom tp for my bunghole.

  • Beanhimself

    I once used a $3 sock to wipe after an unexpected bowel appearance deep in the woods. In other news its hump day.

  • Omar Nachtraaf

    They make this because in Japan it is customary to give consumables as gift such as washing powder or toilet paper. Just making more fancy toilet paper means it's a greater gift.

  • Guest

    If you're going to TP a famous artists house, this would be the appropriate toilet paper.

  • Finally! Art I can smear turds on without getting arrested.

  • Trip Affleck

    you use a roll a day? lay off the food truck tacos...

  • Pretty sure someone will come up with a competing service: custom-designed toilet paper AND escort service to wipe your ass for you.

  • disqus_k2QxOV9H7Z

    Custom toilet paper might be a good idea. From literature to porn to jokes in the end of the roll.

  • Don't forget the face of your boss/ex-wife/ex-boyfriend/Justin Bieber/etc :P

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