Giant 550-Ton Russian Hovercraft Surprises Beachgoers

August 23, 2013


I see butts!

As even more proof that most Russians don't give a f***, this is a video of a giant Russian military Zubr class hovercraft coming ashore while a bunch of beach-goers just sit and watch instead of running and screaming HOLY SHIT WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE like any non-Russian would. Fearless!

Russia's Zubrs (which can come equipped with missile launchers, automatic gun mounts, etc.), after all, are reportedly the largest hovercrafts on Earth, and are built to accommodate an array of armored tanks and vehicles, not to mention hundreds of troops. Needless to say, a routine docking exercise is not the kind of thing an aquatic craft with a Zubr's heft does discreetly, especially not in the presence of hundreds of sunscreen-slathered civvies.

Damn, that thing is HUGE. Too bad I bet your boyfriend/girlfriend is still over the maximum weight capacity. I didn't mean that. I'm sure they're beautiful people with beautiful hearts. I don't like being mean, it's just-- "Your heart is two sizes too small?" Not exactly. You know how in 'The Temple of Doom' that guy Mola Ram pulls that other dude's heart out of his chest? Well let's just say if he did that to me he'd be holding a kidney.

Hit the jump for two videos. Kidneys don't know love. :(

Thanks to nick and Gothik Filth, who only land their hovercrafts on secluded beaches, but away from any sea turtle nesting sites, because they care.

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