1-In-50-Million Bi-Colored Blue And Red Lobster

August 16, 2013


This is an estimated 1-in-50-million-specimen bi-colored blue and red lobster caught in Newfoundland (previously, a 1-in-30-million spotted calico lobster). That's pretty rare. Even rarer than my roommate being able to sleep through a whole night without waking himself up farting and then trying to cry to me about it.

*knock on bedroom door*
Me: That better be a f***ing burglar.
Derek: I did it again.
Derek: What's the matter with me?
Me: You're f***ing disgusting, that's what, NOW GO BACK TO BED.
Derek: Will you make me some tea?
Me: Dude -- one more word and I swear I won't hold back the next time your mom makes a pass at me.
Derek: Please don't.
Me: Remember last week when you drank the last of my chocolate milk? You remember how upset I was?
Derek: Yeah.
Me: And then I told you I was going out on a special date that night?
Derek: What about it?
Me: I boned your dad, Derek, NOW GO BACK TO BED.

Thanks to Lydia, who only wants to know what it tastes like.

  • nicholas

    This is so real

  • Guest

    Harvey Dent as a lobstah!

  • baal

    That lobster fisher needs to be paid more. Look what lobster handling does to your hands!

  • william wallace


  • Woooot, ol' GW finally made a post about my home province (yep, we have provinces in Canada, not states...) AND of a cool lookin' lobster! YEAH!!

  • zin

    I'm honestly more curious about those lobster-handling gloves. Who ever knew there was such a thing?

  • MissAppleberrySwirl

    Really? No Sollux comments yet?

  • Captain Matticus, LP Inc.

    I wonder if the blue-red ones are mortal enemies of the red-blue ones.

  • But what does it taste like?

  • ODwanKenObi

    Chicken. Tastes like chicken.

  • Turbosloth


  • Stephie

    I love Newfoundland :3
    The fishery here is craycray, so I can see them pulling up some insane things from the deep blue.

  • Robin Manford

    I feel kinda bad for Derek today.

  • ODwanKenObi

    He got what was comin to him

  • Gregarious

    It is bi-coloured because the two sides are two different genders. The only way this happens is when the lobster is a hermaphrodite. The gender can be determined by examining the swimmerettes underneath.

  • Bubbubsky

    Biology FTW!

  • Robin Manford

    But lobsters don't like being turned upside-down.

    Oh wait no, that's rabbits.

  • baal

    Turtles. I have one. It gets very unhappy if you carry it but flipping it over 1. pisses it of 2. makes it stop clawing and wiggling (=safer to carry).

  • Mr. Popo

    Almost 20 years playing pokémon and everyone has a shiny but me... well half-shiny but it's something.

  • Jacques-André Langelier

    1 in 50 millions is yellow and 1 in 100 millions is albinos (white)

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