Mexico Passes U.S. As Fattest Country In N. Hemisphere

July 10, 2013

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Because America's finding it harder and harder to stay on top of anything, Mexico has officially passed the United States as the obese-est country in the northern hemisphere. I know, I know -- apparently this whole bacon fiasco was for naught.

With a 32.8 percent adult obesity rate, Mexico just inches past the 31.8 percent obesity rate in the United States, according to a study released last month by the United Nations Food and Agricultural Organization.


That makes Mexico the most obese country in the hemisphere and one of the fattest countries on the planet.

Barry Popkin [surprisingly no relation to Mary Poppins], an obesity expert at the University of North Carolina, attributes much of the spike in Mexican obesity to increased consumption of cheap sugary drinks and mass-marketed snack foods (the type of things that got Americans fat as well), which have displaced home-cooked meals, along with fresh fruits and vegetables.

It's a fact folks: cheap sugary drinks and fatty snack foods pack on the pounds. Just ask my gut. "COOKIES AND SODA ME, STAT." But we had a cake for lunch! "Chips Ahoy or I'll tell your intestines to shit on the subway again." See? This is what I have to live with. "Not for much longer." HOHO -- GOOD ONE, HEART.

Thanks to gordo (good one!), Jeremy, strawstack and Caroline, who convinced me to hit up an all-you-can-eat buffet with them twice a day for a year and then we're gonna start our own country and take the title away from Mexico.

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