What Would Happen If Superman Punched You IRL

June 14, 2013


This is a video of Jake explaining what would happen if Superman punched you in real life. SURPRISE: basically you'd be torn apart at the molecular level in a nuclear explosion. Unless he made the mistake of punching me, in which case he'd break every bone in his hand. "Oh right, because you're soooooooo tough." *unbuttons collar to reveal Kryptonite pendant* Not tough, just smart. "That's quartz." Man, yard sale people are LIARS.

Hit the jump for the much lengthier, scientific explanation.

Thanks Jake, but what would happen if Superman punched HIMSELF?

  • kiebeau

    so, in controlled conditions, superman can be a punch powered power station . . .

  • antalicus

    Superman puts on lead suit = Batman dead. Superman could encase himself in concrete or the moon for that matter and fly into Batman using his vision to see where hes going.

  • Mayoor Butani

    hahaha funny

  • sandra

    What a broader thinking and imagination, I appreciate it.

    Buy outdoor furniture

  • AtomicMug

    I wish he'd punch my ex-wife like that.

  • baal

    While I'm sure your ex-wife is a terrible person, threats of physical RL violence are bad.

  • tayatayat

    you are a Huge tool

  • AtomicMug

    Thanks for the life-lesson, baal. You're right. Nuthin' but the straight-and-narrow for me from here on out!

  • Guest

    Imagine a fish pancake that is atomically thin.

  • vadersapp

    Tell me again how Batman wins in a fight with Superman?

  • Nestor Sanchez

    .....kryptonite....while the man of steel can do all that damage he is still allergic to rocks

  • Artor

    Kryptonite power armor was the method used I believe .

  • Lee

    Not only did Batmans spine heal in less than half a year in a cave with no medical equipment, he was also able to climb out of said cave with 'renewed' agility. Its Batman ppl, c'mon!

  • vadersapp

    I believe the hierarchy goes: Superman>Batman>Everybody Else

  • Ron Ramos

    Batman would weave into his batsuit kryptonite and then proceed to raping him.

  • MikeTen

    Superman could use heat vision from a mile away and vaporize Batman or drop something heavy on Batman from orbit.

  • vadersapp

    First of all, stop using the word "rape" like that. Second, you're assuming Superman would stand face to face with a kryptonite clad Batman rather than any thousands of other more likely scenarios. Suppose Superman decided to instead compress a bit of metal into a baseball sized hunk and threw it with the same force he could a punch. Same amount of energy but well outside of the range of the kryptonite radiation. Batman is dead. Or what if Superman simply flew at batman to punch him from outside the kyrptonite's effective range. Even if it instantly weakened Superman, he's still moving at 99% light speed. Batman is still dead. If we're assuming Superman is going all out, not holding back at all, Batman is dead every time.

  • tayatayat

    you are a huge tool


  • vadersapp

    And you're a dick. Nice to meet you.

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