Put Me On The First Rocket There: Three Alien Planets Discovered In Habitable Zone Of Nearby Star

June 26, 2013

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In 'hope for the future' news, astronomers have confirmed three alien planets in the habitable zone (where liquid water could exist) of a nearby star. How close is nearby? Just 22-light years -- that's only like 130-trillion miles! Humans will never set foot on these planets.

Gliese 667C is a very well-studied star. Just over one third of the mass of the Sun, it is part of a triple star system known as Gliese 667 (also referred to as GJ 667), 22 light-years away in the constellation of Scorpius (The Scorpion). This is quite close to us -- within the Sun's neighbourhood -- and much closer than the star systems investigated using telescopes such as the planet-hunting Kepler space telescope.


A team of astronomers has combined new observations of Gliese 667C with existing data from HARPS at ESO's 3.6-metre telescope in Chile, to reveal a system with at least six planets. A record-breaking three of these planets are super-Earths lying in the zone around the star where liquid water could exist, making them possible candidates for the presence of life. This is the first system found with a fully packed habitable zone.

I'm gonna be real with you: I'm pretty sure the only hope for humanity escaping our solar system and colonizing other parts of the galaxy is if aliens come pick us up and take us. And probably as part of some sort of traveling zoo exhibit. Hey -- I'd be cool with it. You think I can't masturbate with aliens watching? DONE IT BEFORE.

Thanks to Bria, who agrees without worm holes or warp drives humanity is going nowhere fast.

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