The Oldest Water Found On Earth Is 2.6-Billion Years Old

May 16, 2013


Scientists analyzing a two-mile deep mine in Ontario, Canada have discovered what is currently the oldest water known to date, at 2.6-billion years old. "Pfft, that's nothing." METHUSELAH YOU STAY OUT OF THIS.

The scientists analyzed water they found 2 miles (2.4 km) deep. They focused on noble gases such as helium, neon, argon and xenon. Past studies analyzing bubbles of air trapped within ancient rocks found that these rare gases could occur in distinct ratios linked with certain eras of Earth's history. As such, by analyzing the ratios of noble gases seen in this water, the researchers could deduce the age of the water.

The finding, announced in the May 16 issue of the journal Nature, raises the tantalizing possibility that ancient life might be found deep underground not only within Earth, but in similar oases that may exist on Mars, the scientists who studied the water said.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking? We bottle it and sell it to rich people for like $600/bottle! I don't know, print something on the side about anti-aging properties -- women love hearing that. And something about a bigger, firmer erection -- men AND women love hearing that. Hell, sometimes I just lay around repeating it to myself like it's some sort of magic boner spell. It's not though, you have to drink our water to get one.

Thanks to Jaucet, who will insists he'll stick to drinking filtered water from the faucet like a normal person who doesn't care about staying perpetually young looking or rocking a boner the size of a bar stool. Your loss, man.

  • Andrew

    1 mile = 1.6km

  • the water was found in Timmins in Ontario, Canada

    Timmins is a city,

    Ontario is a Province or to Americans something like a state
    Ontario is 415,598 square miles, so you cant just say Ontario.

    Canada is a country.

  • Lee

    Im surprised no one was thinking of Journey to the Centre of the Earth...

  • Matty Spinny

    drink it i dare u

  • The Oldest Water Found On Earth Is Believed To Be 2.6-Billion Years Old!

  • Turbosloth

    While perhaps not entirely accurate, it's a lot better than those nut job creationist pseudo-scientists claiming Earth is only 10,000 years old and Dinosaurs and humans co-existed.

  • Frédéric Purenne

    Oldest water in Canada and you touch it with your hands? Because we totally didn't want to study those bacteria of course! -_-

  • Grue

    AHH! Don't drink the water. Don't even touch it. Not one drop!

  • ValenteFV

    doctor who?

  • Teresa Pundsack

    Bare handed? Seriously? Have you never seen a low budget horror movie?

  • For real, if you think that shit is safe I got like 8 episodes of X-files that say you're head's clear up your alien-bacteria filled ass.

  • Kaye Ting

    That is why this "scientist" has since cease to exists under the acknowledgment of the federal government and all public records.

  • @facebook-1099974401:disqus jυst bеfоrе і sаw tհе bаոĸ  drаft оf $9998, і ассерt tհа frіеոd rеаlly tаĸіոg հоmе mоոеy  іո tհеіr sраrе tіmе оո tհеіr аррlе lарtор.. tհеrе frіеոds соυsіո հаd bеаո dоіոg tհіs lеss  tհаո sеvеոtееո mоոtհs аոd jυst ոоw раіd fоr tհе mоrgаgе оո  tհеіr հоυsе аոd bоυrt а  grеаt  Mіոі соореr. gо tо,

  • Love the story.... However the title is incorrect as all water on earth is the same age. The water that has been found has been sealed off for 2.6 billion years.

  • Bobert

    Not all the water is the same age, you have to take in account comets crashing on earth at different periods bringing moar water!... of course once the water mix, IT BECOMES ONE BIG GIANT ROBOT OF WATER.

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