Going The Distance: Father Hires In-Game Asssassins To Constantly Kill Son's Character, Discourage His Gaming

January 7, 2013


A Chinese father hired a group of in-game assassins to constantly target and kill his 23-year old son's character in his favorite role playing game in an attempt to discourage his gaming habits and convince him to get a job. Good luck with that. I'm pretty sure dying all day in a video game is still better than having to work.

Unhappy with his son not finding a job, Feng decided to hire players in his son's favorite online games to hunt down Xiao Feng. It is unknown where or how Feng found the in-game assassins--every one of the players he hired were stronger and higher leveled than Xiao Feng. Feng's idea was that his son would get bored of playing games if he was killed every time he logged on, and that he would start putting more effort into getting a job.

Despite being sick of getting killed every time, Xiao Feng decided to stick up to his father and tell him how he felt. He was quoted as saying, "I can play or I can not play, it doesn't bother me. I'm not looking for any job--I want to take some time to find one that suits me."

Ahahahaha @ 'I can play or I can not play, it doesn't bother me.' Suuuuure it doesn't. Then you won't mind if I just take computer away then, will you? "Touch that and die." But I thought you didn't have to play! "I don't, I need it for job hunting." LIKELY STORY BROBRO.

Thanks to Dank and fat piggie, who agree the best way to discourage your son's gaming habits is breaking his computer over your knee while staring him in the eyes and yelling, "I'M DOING THIS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU."

  • the son... CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

  • Fry

    I would just play until I could beat them all

  • Is it not ironic that he essentially gave those other players a job, doing exactly what he was trying to stop his kid from doing? I think the moral for the kid is this: "Keep playing assassins creed. If you get good enough, there's money it it."

  • DarkRyNo

    Helpful tip: Find the nearest hammer, next hijack the kids computer/console, and proceed to beating the shit out if it. Problem Solved, now he has to get a job to buy a new computer/console, Also just turn of his internet connection and make him pay for it himself, problem solved again!

  • broodax

    1 smash it with a hammer for all i fucking care il rebuild it
    3. destroy console and disk and disconnection from the internet? il be back around midnight im going over to a buddys house to play assassins creed FUCK YOU PARENTS *gets back and the doors locked* ??? *kick in door* home sweet home

  • Jono Charles Davey

    The Ezio picture just makes this twice as entertaining.

  • Lol that would only motivate me to get better at the game

  • Csomák Gábor

    my ex girlfriend hired my game master in D&D to kill my character, so I can be with her more. I was killed by rats..

  • Jadis

    guessing that's why she's an ex, but that's pretty hilarious.

  • Bob Thayer

    My favorite part about that anecdote is the phrase "ex-girlfriend."
    Sounds like she was quite a troll. Hope you used fire.

  • And what happens when the son starts pwning the assassin?

  • Jono Charles Davey

    That's when the child has become a man~.

  • Lee

    He was thinking outside the box - but not still not outside of the packaging.

  • GizmoDuck

    parenting at it finest.

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