Who Said It's Gonna Be A Flood?: Man Spends Life Savings Building Boat To Escape Mayan Apocalypse

November 27, 2012


A man in China has spent his life savings building his own Noah's Ark to save him from December 21's Mayan apocalypse. No word what he's going to do when the date comes and goes and nothing happens, but hopefully he can turn that thing into a pirate ship and start looting other boats to make up for his loss. That's what I would do (plus drink grog and do backflips off the plank).

The vessel, which has cost him ¥1million (£100,000), measures 21.2m long, 15.5m wide, 5.6m high and displaces about 140 tons of water.

Lu, from Urumqi, Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region, admits it's not much to look at, but is confident it will serve its purpose.

Scientists and researchers are going out of their way to assure people that December 21, 2012, the so-called Mayan end-date, will not bring about the end of the world.

But that hasn't stopped some from ploughing on with their own safety measures regardless.

My God that's sad. I mean, who told you the world was really gonna end on the 21st anyways? Are you like, an expert on Mayan culture and their beliefs? No? You just read it on a website, didn't you? Well if it wasn't on Geekologie THEN IT CAN'T BE TRUSTED. Besides, flooding isn't the only kind of apocalypse, you know. I bet that boat would suck in lava. That's why I built a spaceship. Later, suckers! *pushes button, explodes on launchpad* I'M FREEEEEEEEE.

Hit the jump for a couple more shots of the mistake.



Thanks to xer and Nape (who I thought was Nate at first until I saw how far away the P and T are on the keyboard), who informed me the world won't end until THEY want it to. Wait, are you...Illuminati?!

  • billwald

    He obviously was NOT a marine architect. To much "top hamper."

    If I was 30 years younger and the price of waterfront property drops due to climate change I would build a big cabin on a steel barge. Paint flowers on the hull.

  • ZomBBombeR

    Fuck it: Zombies, floods...floods of Zombies, invasion, earthquakes etc etc...I don't care what if anything happens on the 21st of December, I'll be no more or less prepared for catastrophy than any other day.

  • Brant_Alan

    A submarine would be a much wiser investment.
    At least you could spend your time trying to find sunken treasure safely.

  • The people of the area supposed to be Muslims,maybe he isn't himself.
    All of those who really believes 21 december is the end give me your money you will not need it anymore

  • Eye Boogie

    Our thoughts on December 21st! http://www.youtube.com/watc...

  • If this "Mayan event" doesn't occur, at least he keeps this epic boat.

  • RDarker

    the ones in movie 2012 were better. Airtight fool!

  • Frédéric Purenne

    The sad part is that there seems to be no water nearby whatsoever... good luck using it when the apocalypse doesn't happen!

  • Greg

    Haha, yup! Urumqi is actually the furthest city from the Sea on the entire planet, so if the apocolypse doesn't happen he's screwed.

  • Vin Moretti

    If the world doesn't end, it'll make a very nice houseboat.

  • or party boat. :D

  • That's a river boat. It's going to be pretty useless if it was to go all Waterworld and the weather turned bad - that and the world isn't going to end.

  • ElSpanielo

    Ain't nobody survivin' nuttin' in that boat!

  • Peter Bourque

    Well Noah must be crying....laughing that is.

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