Breath Strips That Heal Burns From Eating Hot Pizza

October 17, 2012


Damn bro, now make one for busted-ass eyes.

Because people won't stop eating and drinking things that burn their mouths, scientists have created a dissolvable oral strip that can be applied directly to the burn, "providing instant relief and promoting healing." Healing -- healing is good. That's why I visit my shrink twice a week. Issues: I have a lot of them.

"We found these strips to be non-toxic, which has huge potential for anyone who burns their mouth while eating and drinking hot foods--and that's just about everyone," said McConville. "The strips look and behave similar to breath freshening strips that you might find at your local drugstore."

Now based at the University of New Mexico, McConville, and his team, will explore creating a stronger oral strip to treat more severe burns lasting longer than 2-3 days. The next step in furthering their research will be to test the strips in humans and experiment with taste-masking.

Listen: if you're regularly eating scalding pizza and burning your mouth because you can't wait five minutes or blow on it, I think there are bigger issues at hand. "Says the guy who made his own Atomic Fireball anal beads." Dammit I told you that in confidence.

Thanks to PYY, who agrees cold pizza for breakfast is where it's at. Yes! And chocolate milk.

  • jesus

    I JUST burned my mouth... It's an omen!

  • Guest

    My leathery man mouth doesn't need this since it can stand the heat of a piping hot cup of coffee. >:3

  • Ana

    So.. nobody tried Borax Glycerin on the burn (or even on a bite) until now?
    It's very cheap, you can find it in any pharmacy and the healing process works really fast if you put it on a tampon and hold it on the wound for a few minutes.
    These strips sound to me like a reinvented wheel.

  • Hofnar Aurel-Dragos

    Is that Joseph Fritzl in this picture ?

  • luxlucetintenebris

    "We found these strips to be non-toxic", it sounds like they were trying out some toxic ones first or they just weren't sure!

  • Some days I really need these. Hurry up with them already!

  • Usually, drinking cold water right after a burn works just as well.

  • Anodos

    Youve tried them?

  • callam

    McConville sounds like a very dubious name.

  • I burn my tongue less and less often nowadays, despite eating hot foods, but the downside is that the burns are usually pretty brutal and last awhile. These will be pretty helpful, but I can't imagine the market being extremely wide for its intended use!

  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy

    now invent something for my butthole the morning after eating a plate full of habanero hot wings.

  • Toilet paper in the fridge.

  • Guest

    He did mention habanero, the freezer would be a more fitting place.

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