Idiot Fakes His Own Death As Part Of Marriage Proposal

September 4, 2012


30-year old Russian businessman Alexey Bykov decided to propose to his girlfriend, but not before enlisting the help of an entire crew of people to help fake his own death in a horrible car accident to see how she would react to his passing. What a f***ing idiot. After telling his bride-to-be to meet him at a certain location:

"When I arrived there were mangled cars everywhere, ambulances, smoke, and carnage," Kolokov told Russian media. "Then when I saw Alexey covered in blood lying in the road a paramedic told me he was dead and I just broke down in tears."

With his mission accomplished, Bykov rose from the dead and proposed to his stunned partner while drenched in "blood." Kolokov said she contemplated killing him "for real this time," but decided to agree to marry the lunatic instead.

"I wanted her to realise how empty her life would be without me and how life would have no meaning without me," Bykov said. "I think it worked but I promise it's the last time."

Damn brobro, think pretty highly of yourself or what? If were her I would have kicked ol' Alexey in the nuts, told him his brother's penis is WAY nicer, then started making out with one of the fake paramedics. But that's just me and I'm a proud, independent woman.

Thanks to X Pac and Joseph, who agree faking your own death is better saved for an anniversary.

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