WTF, Guys? Invite Me Next Time: Family Of Bears Break Into Norgwegian Cabin, Chug 100 Beers, Trash The Place

August 14, 2012


Picture unrelated: he actually bought that beer.

Because even bears know how to party harder than most of my friends (thanks for the birthday party, jerks!), a family of black bears recently TORE THE WALL OFF A CABIN to gain access, chugged over 100 beers and ate all the food inside, then shat and pissed everywhere. No word if they thought that was the cabin where Goldilocks lived, but bears are notoriously poor with addresses.

"They had a hell of a party in there," cabin owner Even Borthen Nilsen told NRK. "The cabin has the stench of a right old piss up, trash, and bears."

The bear, and three cubs, are reported to have forced their way into the cabin by ripping a wall off.

"The entire cabin was destroyed," Nilsen told the local daily.

"The beds and all kitchen appliances, stove, oven and cupboards and shelves were all smashed to pieces," he said.

And furthermore the bears had finished off all the food and drink in the house - including all the marshmallows, chocolate spread, honey and over 100 cans of beer.

Nilsen explained that excrement on the outside of the cabin left him in no doubt that it was a family of bears which had taken over his cabin for night of feasting and drunken revelry.

"You can see footprints on the windows," he said.

Did you read that? Footprints on the windows. My God that must've been one hell of a party. Bears getting so drunk they can f***ing walk on walls? I'm *this close* to moving into the woods and starting a new life.

Thanks to LupusYonderboy, who's actually partied with bears before and says they're pretty cool as long you don't go for a high-five and they accidentally miss and maul your face off.

  • They are Rock Stars!!!!!!!!!!

  • Matthew Anderson

    Reverse Goldilocks?
    Wonder if the whined about the various beer temperatures the whole time...

  • So it's not in the woods it's all over cabin walls.

  • Guest

    The mum is teaching her cubs one important life skill...that is how to party.

  • ZomBBombeR

    Damnit, I never get invited, and they wonder why I keep crashin the teddy bear picknick every year lolZ.

  • Sureee.. It wasn't you that trashed the place, bears did it... Yeah.. haha

  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy

    Exactly. 100 beers? Party got way out of hand. Invited too many people over. Got drunk...pissed and shitted everywhere. Bunch of drunks decided that if they hit the wall together they could knock it down. I've been there. It happens.

  • Jeremy Tilton

    The Milwaukee's Best was too watery. The Arrogant Bastard was too hoppy. But the Fat Tire was juuuuuuust right!

  • Why did these people even have 100 beers in cabin they were away from long enough for bears to tear off a wall?

  • His mother and grandmother were first on the scene.....THEY were going to drink the 100 beers with the bears weren't they. now it makes sense, the bears just showed up early to avoid chipping in for the keg

  • ,,,Every human DOES carry a rifle or shotgun at all times right? it isn't just me?

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