Bill Nye Challenges 'F***ing Idiot' Congressman Todd Akin To A Debate (Plus Drops The F-Bomb A Lot)

August 30, 2012


Note: Story is satire (READ: FAKE). I just love rage and cussing so much I want it to be true. Plus duels.

US Congressman Todd Akin accused Bill Nye of personally summoning God's wrath in the form of Hurricane Issac after Nye posting a video last week discussing why creationism shouldn't be taught to children (you can see that video HERE if you haven't already). Bill, in return, dropped the f-bomb a lot during an interview and challenged Todd to a debate.

"Look, these people they're f*cking retarded. Rape can't cause pregnancy? Breastmilk cures homosexuality? I caused a hurricane by challenging creationism? Who can possibly take these people seriously anymore?"

"...Now they don't even believe in egg + sperm = baby. Where does Todd Akin think babies come from? Does he think there are separate storks for people who were raped and people who weren't? "

"Hey look at me! I'm the rape stork. I drop off all my babies directly at the orphanage."

"He's a f*cking idiot. Just a plain f*cking idiot. I'm sorry - I don't say that word very often - but it happens to fit in this case. He's just a f*cking idiot."

"So Todd I got an offer for you. You and me. Any time. Any place. Debating science mano-a-mano. I'll bring the facts, and you bring the Vaseline. Because your ass is gonna f*cking need it when I'm done whipping."

Nye apologized once more for his language before ripping off his microphone and walking off the set.

I actually had a college professor call me a f***ing idiot in class once but it was under completely different circumstances. You see what happened was, my buddy Y-Tree and I were playing the penis game (where you go back and forth saying penis louder and louder until somebody's too afraid to do it), and I just yelled it at the top of my lungs at the very beginning. We used to play the vagina game too. I have a master's degree -- just let that sink in.

Thanks to Alexandria and Jason, who were both kicked off the college debate team for constantly yelling 'OBJECTION!' and banging their heads on the desk.

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