This is a talking urinal cake. They're going to be placed in bars around Michigan as a collaboration between urinal cake manufacturer Wizmark and the Michigan State Police to help curb drunk driving. After sensing movement they say stuff like, "Damn bro, nice peen" and "Try to drown me, I dare you!" No, no they don't.
In this case, they tell potentially tipsy patrons: "Listen up. That's right, I'm talking to you. Had a few drinks? Maybe a few too many? Then do yourself and everyone else a favor: Call a sober friend or a cab. Oh, and don't forget to wash your hands."
The talking puck-baskets cost $21 apiece, which, I dunno, seems a little expensive for a talking greeting card that's waterproof. Besides, if you get drunk enough, and regular urinal cakes will talk on their own. You know what they say? 'Eaaaaaaaat me.' Well maybe just a nibble!
Thanks to Evil Ares, who's so evil he just pisses on the floor in front of the urinal where the next person has to stand.