For The Ladies (And Dudes Like Me): Custom-Sized Sparkly Mermaid Tails You Can Actually Swim In!

July 9, 2012

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Etsy seller Monika Naumann is selling these custom $250 mermaid tails with attached fin so you can swim like Ariel. Yayayayayay! Sure you could probably get the material and make your own for cheaper, but let's not kid ourselves, you'd wind up sewing your legs together and drowning. I'm not sure if you're supposed to wear a bathing suit under the tail, but I didn't and now my privates are chaffed. It looks like I passed out and Sebastian and the rest of his crab friends had their way picking at them. Obviously, it's gonna be a while before I can live out any my sexy mermaid fantasies. But, until then *combing hair in bathtub with seashell bra on* ♫ A whole new wooooooooorld ♫ "That's from Aladdin." DON'T YOU RUIN THIS FOR ME.

Hit the jump for a dizzying video demo.

Thanks to bb, who would make a killer Ariel. I'm serious -- like, Ariel with a knife who will stab you.

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