WTF Were You Thinking?: Crazy Woman Tries Hiring Facebook Hitman To Kill 'Somebody Wearing Fur'

February 23, 2012


27-year old Meredith Lowell had a plan. A plan of hiring a hitman on Facebook to stab somebody to death wearing fur at a public library, then she'd swoop in and immediately start passing out animal rights propaganda. Unsurprisingly, it didn't work. No word if she's ever heard of LinkedIn.

An undercover FBI agent then contacted her, posing as a hit man after the agency subpoenaed Facebook to uncover details about her profile.

She then allegedly requested that the murder take place at a local library and that she be present so that she could then hand out documents about animal cruelty after the homicide.

"Bring a sharp knife that is at least 4 inches long, it should be sharp enough to stab someone with and/or to slit their throat to kill them," Lowell allegedly wrote in an e-mail, according to the affidavit.

The individual should be at least 12 years old, but "preferably 14 years or older," Lowell allegedly wrote.

"I want the person dead in less than 2 minutes (under 2 minutes or 1 minute or less would be better.)"

You should never hire a 12-year old hitman aside, I meet a lot of crazy people on the bus, but this girl blows them all out of the water. I mean, how does somebody get so wildly adamant about a cause that they're willing to solicit murder? "Maybe she was raised by foxes." You...are a genius.

Woman accused of hiring hit man to kill random fur-wearer

Thanks to Evil Ares, who's so evil he was once hired as a hitman, then immediately shot the person who hired him.

  • William Samuel

    If we're lucky, maybe she can give us some info on ELF. Then again, most of their members are more discreet. Oh well, Peta handouts will do that to you.

  • This is what's wrong with the world.

  • What an idiot and a complete waste of space.

  • Mr. Bones

    dammit PETA, stop brainwashing crazy people.

    "I want you to murder someone, preferably at least 12 years old, so I can then handout pamphlets on animal cruelty... because, you know, people will totally stick around to listen to me and read a pamphlet after someone was MURDERED FOR NO REASON IN A GODDAMN LIBRARY!"

  • n_a_a_s

    hehehe that picture is awesome GW

  • luxlucetintenebris

    What a nutjob.

  • Woooooooowwww

  • JJtoob

    Should have hired the ruthless Varia. Voiiiii!!!


  • Rayn_A

    It scares me that people like her exist....

  • Kimberly Fischer


  • We should hire someone to kill her and then hand out anti-PETA propaganda flyers.

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