Russian Scientists 'Resurrect' 30,000 Year Old Flowers

February 21, 2012

old-ass-flowers.jpg

Seen here looking suspiciously like an artist's rendering instead of an actual photo, two stems of Sylene stenophylla bloom after the seeds laid dormant in an ice age squirrel's burrow for some 30,000 years. That...is a long time. Way longer than any of my seeds have stayed viable. "Ha, I was wondering what was up with all the condoms in your freezer." YOU STAY THE F*** OUT OF MY CRYOGENICS LAB.

The Russian research team recovered the fruit after investigating dozens of fossil burrows hidden in ice deposits on the right bank of the lower Kolyma River in northeastern Siberia.


They were firmly cemented together and often totally filled with ice, making any water infiltration impossible - creating a natural freezing chamber fully isolated from the surface.

"If we are lucky, we can find some frozen squirrel tissue," said Mr Gubin. "And this path could lead us all the way to mammoth."

Ugh, enough with trying to resurrect the woolly mammoth already. NOBODY WANTS THAT. Oh look -- a furry elephant, wooptie-f***ing-doo-dah. "You just want the dinosaurs." All I care about is the dinosaurs. We need to do them first. I live a very unhealthy lifestyle and I'm not sure how much time I've got left.

Ice To See You: 30,000-Year-Old Flower Revived [skynews]

Thanks to LupusYonderboy and Jeff, who agree planting seeds that were naturally cryogenically frozen and bringing animals back to life from cloned tissue are two TOTALLY different ball games. Like, Hungry Hungry Hippo vs. kickball.

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