Smooth: Man Wins Lambo, Crashes 6 Hours Later

December 23, 2011


This is why poor people can't have nice things.

David Derp Dopp won this 2008 Lamborghini Murcielago LP-640 in a convenience store's "Joe Shmo to Lambo" contest. Theeeeeeen crashed it in a field six hours later. Because that's what you do with things you win: destroy them. By God I woke up without a Lambo AND I'M GOING TO SLEEP WITHOUT ONE.

Dopp was taking family members and friends on joy rides the first evening. He said he took a curve at about 45 mph and "hit some black ice and spun out." The car jumped a curb and went through a fence before coming to a rest about 75 feet off the road. Neither Dopp nor his passenger was injured.

The lime green convertible was being held by his insurance company at a Utah towing yard. It will be sent to an authorized Las Vegas dealer for repairs next week.

"I already had offers on it. I'm going to sell it," David Dopp said Wednesday. "I have bills more important than a Lamborghini. I've got a family to support."

Pfft, what bills and family are actually more important than a Lamborghini? Everyone can have bills and a family, but a Lambo? That's a once in a miserable lifetime opportunity. If there was a contest for a Lambo where you had to alienate your entire family AND pay a fat tax I would enter it. Hello, sis? I HATE YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN ARE TROLLS. See? Piece of cake. *dialing grandpa*

Hit the jump for a video news report of the sadness.

Man crashes Lamborghini 6 hours after winning it [sfgate]
US man wins Lamborghini, crashes it hours later [google]

Thanks to neolardo, Stephen, Cameron and Evil Ares, who agree if you really want to crash a Lambo you should at least have the decency to drive it off a cliff and parachute out.

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