Against Store Policy: Lady Cooks Meth In Wal-Mart

December 12, 2011


Seen here looking way too too pretty to be cooking meth at Wal-Mart the wrong way, 45-year old Elizabeth Elisha Halfmoon (cool name!) was arrested after spending 6-hours in a Tulsa, Oklahoma Wal-Mart trying to inconspicuously cook crystal meth. Thrifty!

"When I saw her she had just finished mixing sulfuric acid with starter fluid in a bottle," says Officer David Shelby.

"When firefighters were on the scene she made statements to them that is what she was doing, she was attempting to obtain these chemicals and was in the process of trying to manufacture meth. However, she said she was not very good at it," said Shelby.

Reportedly she told respondents to the scene she was "too broke" to buy the chemicals.
An officer on the scene, who did not realize the bottle was active, picked up the bottle to discard it and was injured as the mix burned through the bottle and his gloves. He was medically treated at a local hospital for chemical burns and is reportedly okay.

Oh man, I love the police officer that just walks in and starts picking up bottles of chemicals she'd mixed. What, were you sick the day they made you watch the meth video in police academy? That shit will blow up IN YOUR FACE. You'll never make the bomb squad!

Woman arrested for making meth in Walmart [digitaljournal]
The Saddest Woman Ever to Fail to Cook Meth in a Walmart [gawker]

Thanks to Marlowe, who agrees the only thing that should be cooking at Wal-Mart are the hotdogs at the snack bar. Mmmm, Wal-Mart wieners.

  • i would totally boink her

  • Audwin Short

    Darling, marry me.


    When the World is not enough, we want it anyway...

  • rikster81

    you know i bet if it wasn't for meth she would not be bad looking, very sad the shit meth does, I hope she doesn't have any kids.

  • Brando D. Commando

    Wait what? She lost her job due to "attempting" to cook up meth, then complained she is broke... 

    Should have just blamed it on your boss... DOOD, I just do what I'm told...

  • Looks eerily like Angelina Jolie, in another 10 years or so.

  • Elisha Gilbert

    This makes me want to change my name.

  • Richard Hessler

    I thoroughly enjoy the nonchalant responses

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