Not Cool: Titanoboa, A 50-Foot, 1-Ton Robotic Snake

November 16, 2011


Those are people in the background.

This is Titanoboa, a 50-foot long robotic snake weighing over 2,000-pounds that was modeled after the actual prehistoric snake of the same name and size. I say we kill it and turn it into cowboy boots. Or lady's handbags -- I don't f***ing care, the important thing is that it's killed.

The final product will have a more polished-looking skin and, if all goes well, be able to move underwater.

Eventually, Titanoboa will support a rider, just like its relative, the Mondo Spider, which was built by the same group.

Brinson says Titanoboa is supposed to strike terror in people's hearts by forcing them to contemplate historical climate change.

Of cooooooourse -- climate change. It was so easy to connect those dots. Giant robotic snake, climate change -- like two peas in a pod in an alternate universe where that actually makes any sense. "Don't you get it? The original Titanoboa was extincted by climate change." YOU CAN'T PROVE THAT! "Well it's true." Oh right, and you just expect me to believe some internet commenter? You said I eat penises in my last article!

Hit the jump for a video of Roboconda in action.

Giant Robot Snake Of The Day []

Thanks to Mark, who says giant robotic Dune sandworms or GTFO.

  • Just think of the size of its Babies---8 footers at birth, and an egg the size of a Volvo. I'd like to hear why animals got so large and then diminished. The only explanation I've heard, concerning insects whose size is limited by their trachea or something, was that an abundance of oxygen in the atmosphere allowed this increase.

  • Hey! I was first ..... !! thats never happened. People should really leave GW alone. 

  • mckinz

    All those hours spent making this thing and then they release it onto the internet with a shaky camera phone video #WeakShowing #MoreCowbell #SnakeDick

  • Guest

    Your layout should be a black and dark gray chrome  robot, head at the top with your website name embedded into his 'skin', his eyes and the post links can be electric blue...or red...or green! OR it could change between those colors everytime you refresh/open a new link. I mean, might as well make a design that resembles the content of the website. And has sweet art giving you something cool to look at.

    Even though it's really just a secret ploy so that I can get the robots to TAKE OVER YOUR SITE TOO >:D

    No but seriously, do something interesting. You can do better than just 'bringing back a new black design' [:

  • Davidsadi

    almost fell for that GE sponsored post... almost, but then i didn't see any spelling mistakes or wordwizardry

  • Is it just me or is the guy riding the machine way more interesting

  • Legendxlm

    You're right.

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