New And Improved ASIMO Robot Can Run, Jump

November 8, 2011


Seen here preventing an invisible giant's balls from touching the floor, Honda's ASIMO robot has undergone a series of upgrades, making him lighter, faster, and more autonomous (not to mention less likely to fall up and down stairs). Wonderful news in the middle of a site upgrade, really. LORD JUST TAKE ME NOW.

Honda's robot isn't just smarter, it's lighter, and as a result, faster too. Honda put Asimo on Jenny Craig and it's now 13.2 pounds lighter and can move at 5.59 miles per hour as opposed to the 3.73 miles per hour it was getting before.

The Wall Street Journal had this to say about the new Asimo:

"Honda brags Asimo is capable of "responding to the movement of people and the surrounding situations...Asimo is now capable of predicting the direction a person will walk within the next few seconds based on information from pre-set space sensors and quickly determine to take an alternate path to avoid a collision with the person if the estimated locations of the person and the Asimo intersect."

There's a video of ASIMO running around and hopping on one foot after the jump, which looks suspiciously like a child wearing a robot costume. God, we can only hope. Actually, that's not true -- we could pray too. "AND ask Santa." What the -- and risk not getting a hoverboard? You're out of your f***ing mind!

Hit the jump for a video of the are you faster than 5.59MPH?

New and improved Honda Asimo humanoid robot now more autonomous [dvice]

Thanks to Lex, Arturo, maddy and KILL IT WITH FIRE (now that's what I'm talkin' about!), who agree there's absolutely no purpose in developing humanoid robots. ZERO, END OF DISCUSSION.

  • your_site_sucks_balls_now

    Feedback on the site changes.  It sucks donkey balls.
    I'm not just saying that because I hate change, which I do.  I'm saying that because everything is highlighted and accented in pink.  My guess is that your reader base is heavily male in the range of say 25-35.  Based upon the comments that you add to each story you are also male thus there would be no reason to use pink unless you wanted all your male readers to leave.  If I wanted to read "Shine" magazine from yahoo and catch up on all the days gossip I would be reading that site instead.

    You now require all your users to log in to post comments?  It took me 10 mins to create a fake account to figure out how to post on your site.  Like I'm going to provide you with my facebook page so that you can troll me at some later point in time or sell my account information to some sales group.
    Seriously GW, I will probably visit your site 5 more times before I never visit again. 

  • your_site_sucks_balls_now

    Double post, this website sucks.

  • mefu

    GW - just make an option to change the background to black and everybody will shut the fuck up!

  • Soylent Green Is People


    (The new site design. The robot is kinda alright by comparison.)

  • haters gonna hate

  • Yeah my eyes are bleeding now. I liked the dark grimy feel of 'classic' GW site. Is this some kind of New Coke marketing ploy? 

  • Sean Ellery

    can the new and improved asimo fix the appearance of geekologie?

  • Cool beans. GW, I've actually wanted the site to change design; but I think you should offer alternate skins. I honestly would prefer charcoal gray as a theme.

    Maybe do a poll?

  • Peter McMillan

    Some Constructive Criticism..........
    My only gripe with the new layout it that the posts visually meld together too much as i scroll down the main page. 'Hitting the jump' is a little less obvious too.
    Before it was very clear because the pink (wtf?) titles above each story seperated them very well.

    I like the design, i just prefer the 'readability' of the older version.

    Keep up the great work GW, you make my work day bearable.

    Cheers From Sydney Australia.

    PS - New asimo is getting pretty freaky.

  • Luis Cárdenas

    Why is everything pink and gay now, GW?

  • GDIT

    GW, you were much funnier black.

  • iNemzis

    I like the new layout personally, the other was a bit Geocities for my liking. This looks nice and clean, ala the new Google. I also like the new Asimo!

  • Guest

    Run faster, jump higher!

  • Luis Francisco Olivares Cruz


  • Wow man, at least keep the grey/black font/background. I thought you were catering to those of us who know it's less stressful on the eyes to have a dark background and light text. This is just horrifying.

    New and improved? Sure, but man get rid of the white.

  • Heidi Schulz

    For some reason this reminds me of Young Frankenstein.

    If you're blue and you don't know where to go to why don't you go where fashion sits. RUTTIN ON THE RIIIIIIIIZ!

  • Impressive. UNLIKE THE NEW LAYOUT!

    Jk, jk. I don't care about the new layout.

  • I can pretty much already tell that this new layout is going to be the main point of complaints for the comments sections now.

    Geesh, y'all just are never happy with changes. I think it looks great.

  • chris27scot

    Please change the white background at least, its hurting my eyes

  • Ryan Grennan

    Asimo you're going to leave a stain! Programmer needs to figure out how to get him to put the thermos cap down the other way.

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