'Monkeys Typing Random Letters' Program Has Recreated 99% Of A Shakespeare Poem

September 27, 2011


Inb4 'that's a chimp not a monkey'.

"Is that you, GW?" Is that me what? "In the picture." GOOD ONE, TURDBUCKET. But yes :/ A computer program designed to emulate the infinite monkey theorem (which states that a monkey typing at random for an infinite amount of time will 'almost surely' type any given text -- link to Wikipedia if not familiar ) has successfully recreated 99% of Shakespeare's 'A Lover's Complaint' (your penis is too damn small!), but mostly by cheating.

The success of this simulator seems to be in the volume and the technique used. Anderson's project puts out random strings of characters, and then searches those characters for strings of nine that match any nine characters in any of Shakespeare's works. When it finds a match, it marks those nine characters of a play 'complete'.

Some say that this isn't random enough, and that the original spirit of the infinite monkeys idea was to have them recreate entire works, pages, or even just lines. Nine characters isn't really random, if they're selected from anywhere and put together deliberately.

Yeaaaaaaah, that's not really the same. You can't really say they wrote a Shakespeare poem when in reality it would read:

O that infected moisture of his eye
qewwr a;sd d;l weweman-tits pwqf/a f;aqweio,
dc,das;da, dpewweopa,c d,pwiener'd pdapd
apdpwedangler ,bnvx vnvdboobswdjewakmc ddfapew
dqewpwqep wbonerz qwpe peq f ald pweru p wfp
pd pf dp afpeoqpqp,fd, fd, fqw epbajina qp fp dpa pd
eqpwr fdvds/fj fqbent-peenwpef asl wpeeipqpe dldadl

Pfft, you might as well have just pulled individual letters and said they typed it. I'm calling the experiment a bust and you a hack, brobro! "Sounds like the pot calling the kettle black." *tearing shirt off* WHAT THE F*** IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!

Virtual "monkeys on typewriters" recreate ninety-nine percent of Shakespeare [io9]

Thanks to Shannon, whose tip read like it was typed by monkeys. Get it? She's a drunk. It's cool, she's a friend.

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