Should've Used A Monster Truck: Lithuanian Mayor Crushes Illegally Parked Car In Tank

August 3, 2011


This is a video of Vilnius (the capital of Lithuania) mayor Arturas Zuokas crushing an illegally parked Mercedes in a tank. Except that's not really a tank because tanks have treads (but not all things with treads are tanks!). That right there is what we call an urban assault vehicle. I assume the whole thing was staged, but the point that Mayor Zuokas was trying to make is that illegally parked cars WILL NOT BE TOLERATED. Prostitution, maybe, but not if they're gonna wear those shorts where their buttcheeks are all hanging out the bottom. Those are gross. Still, I'm not sure running over a single car in a wheeled tank-thingy is really the most effective way to deter illegal parking. No, the best way to deter illegal parking is to hide under the perp's car and slit their Achilles tendon when they come to get in. Now that shit -- that shit'll teach somebody a lesson. Just not one about learning to walk again, that's the physical therapist's job.

Hit the jump for the lamest monster truck rally I've ever seen and I've seen them put on in a neighbor's backyard before.


Thanks to killerabbit and neolardo, who only park on roofs because they both fly lolercopters.

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