Apple: Now With More Cash Than The US Gov

July 29, 2011


Apple, a company best known for its popular Apple II computer system during the 80's (right?), officially has more cash lying around than the US government. Uncle Sam? No -- Uncle Jobs. Haha, what do you mean, "I want YOU"? Moooooooom -- your brother's being weird again!

According to the latest statement from the U.S. Treasury, the government had an operating cash balance Wednesday of $73.8 billion. That's still a lot of money, but it's less than what Steve Jobs has lying around.

Tech juggernaut Apple had a whopping $76.2 billion in cash and marketable securities at the end of June, according to its last earnings report.

"We don't let the cash burn a hole in the pocket or make stupid acquisitions," CEO Jobs said last fall. "We'd like to continue to keep our powder dry because we think there are one or more strategic opportunities in the future."

"We'd like to continue to keep our powder dry"? What are you, stockpiling muskets or some shit? OMG, they're forming a militia. *mounting pony* The flannel-coats are coming -- THE FLANNEL-COATS ARE COMING!

Apple now has more cash than the U.S. government [cnn]

Thanks to killerabbit, who'll slit your throat if you even think about touching one of his lucky feet.

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