Duke Nukem Forever Is Out, Apparently Sucky

June 15, 2011


Almost 15-years in painful development, Duke Nukem: Forever dropped in the U.S. yesterday and apparently isn't very good. Like, its reviews have pretty much blown. I'm talking alien wieners here, folks. Green, tentacled ones. "With eyeballs?" *barf* YOU'VE SEEN ONE WITH EYES?!

  • 1UP.com F
  • Edge 3/10
  • Eurogamer 3/10
  • GameSpot (PC) 3.5/10
  • (X360) 3/10
  • GamesRadar 6/10
  • IGN 5.5/10
  • PALGN 5/10
  • PC Gamer US 80/100
  • Joystiq 2/5 stars
  • Ouch. Admittedly, I'm not surprised. You can't revive the King after ten years and still expect him to shit gold. You'd be lucky if it was flecked with craft glitter! Which, based on the reviews, is exactly what it is. Thoughts? Feel free to leave them in the comments, just don't expect anybody to care.

    Duke Nukem Forever on Wikipedia (because I'm a hard-hitting investigative journalist)

    Thanks to Joe, who actually tried polishing a turd once with disastrous results. God, please tell me you weren't using a belt sander.

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