Wear A Belt, Dummy!: Beer Thief Fail

May 2, 2011


You're never gonna fly if you don't spread your wings!

Seen here mid-bellyflop, a beer thief prepares to shotgun two cases of Bud Light cans with his chest. HARDCORE, BRO!

The incident happened around 6:37pm on Wednesday at the E-Z Food Store, located at 15 Acuff Road in Lake Wales

Polk County Sheriff's detectives said the suspect got out of the front passenger side of a black Chevy Lumina, with tinted windows and no tag, and walked into the store.

The video then shows him running out of the store with two cases of Bud Light beer. The suspect tripped, fell, lost his pants and then dropped the beer. He then jumped into the backseat of a vehicle and fled the scene.

First of all, if a tinted car with no tags pulls into my convenience store and parks idling by the exit I AM HITTING THE PANIC BUTTON. And, if they somehow do manage to breach my defenses, I keep a cyanide capsule in the register.

Hit the jump for a video of the 'we can always steal some from my parents' liquor cabinet if we fill it back up with water'.

Beer Thief Trips, Loses Pants On Camera [wtfv] [wftv]

Thanks to neolardo, who once chugged two forties in the back of a 7-11 by the Slurpee machine without being seen. Hoho, we've got a ninja in our presence! *bowing*

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