Seen here kicking a raptor like the sexy little football that he is, a Brontomerus mcintoshi - (bronto, "thunder" and merÃ³s, "thigh") demonstrates the powerful leg muscles for which they were named. God, what I wouldn't give to have him take a fake swing at my balls just once.
The new species, described in the journal Acta Palaeontologica Polonica, is a sauropod - the family of dinosaurs famous for their long necks and tails.
It could have given other animals a hefty kick, say its discoverers.
"If predators came after it, it would have been able to boot them out of the way," said Dr Mike Taylor, from University College London, UK.
"What's interesting is that if it were a sauropod that could move particularly fast, you would expect to see very strong muscles on the back of the leg to pull it along. But we don't; this is the opposite. It seems most likely to us that what this is about is being able to deliver a strong kick," he told BBC News.
So, give it to me straight -- does a dinosaur with thunder thighs definitely have lightning loins? Because I'm not above risking electrocution to get my swerve on. Am I, car battery by the bed? "ZZZZZT!!". That means no. What can I say -- I roll krinky. Also, in neutral. What?! New batteries are f***ing expensive!
Dinosaur named 'thunder-thighs' [bbcnews]
Thanks to Tom, jdivo, Turdboat, David E., Jennaiii, peadar and John, who I hereby declare the official task-force for notifying me when a dino with typhoon titties is discovered. Don't let me down.