Damn You, Skynet!: IBM's Supercomputer Beats Jeopardy Contestants In Warm-Up

January 14, 2011


Seen here getting eye-f***ed by Ken Jennings, IBM's supercomputer 'Watson' beat the two most successful Jeopardy contestants to date (Ken Jennings and Brad Rutter) during a practice round before today's taping of the official showdown airing February 14th. Move over butthole-shaped chocolates, you're getting a robot apocalypse this Valentine's!

Not a single question was answered wrongly, and at the end of the match Watson, who answers questions with a cold computer voice, telegraphing his certainty with simple color changes on his "avatar," was ahead with $4,400, Ken had $3,400, and Brad had $1,200.

Alright, a "win" for silicon for now, but without any Double Jeopardy or Final Jeopardy it's hard to tell how well Watson will do in a real match. What's clear is that he isn't dumb, and it seems like the best chance the humans will have will be buzzing in before Watson can run through his roughly three second decision process and activate his buzzer mechanically. An extra plus for the audience is a graphic that shows the three answers Watson has rated as most likely to be correct, and how certain he is of the answer he selects -- we don't know if that will make it into the actual TV version, but we certainly hope so. It's always nice to know the thought processes of your destroyer.

$1,200, Brad,really? Way to make us all look bad. Geez, even I could have done better.

GW: I'll take, "Woops I just tripped over a power cord and unplugged Watson for the win please, Alex".
Alex: I'm sorry, GW, but you're still trailing Ken by $36,000.
GW: But he's been masturbating behind his podium the whole time!

Hit the jump for a worthwhile video of the practice round in action.

IBM's Watson supercomputer destroys all humans in Jeopardy practice round [engadget]
Watch IBM's Watson AI defeat puny humans in Jeopardy [venturebeat]

Thanks to Argh, e, MrTwinkles, Joshua and McGregor, who suspect Watson was beat long ago -- with Sherlock's penis. DUM-DUM-DUM!

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